Poetry quasi-competition [entries|reading|network|archive]
simont

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Sun 2018-01-21 22:02
Poetry quasi-competition

I woke up this morning with an unholy combination of two famous lines of poetry running around my head. The mashed-up line scans nicely, but I couldn't work out what would be a good follow-up.

So, readers of this diary in all its locations, please send suggestions to follow after this opening line:

If I should die before I wake, think only this of me:

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[personal profile] drswirlySun 2018-01-21 22:12
"Two vast and trunkless legs of stone - and immortality"
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[personal profile] cebSun 2018-01-21 22:30
Bravo!
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[personal profile] simontSun 2018-01-21 22:17
Initially I tried to mash up the original lines that followed each of the starting pair, but the best I could do with them was

That there's some corner of the Lord I pray has taken me.

which is (a) twee, (b) doesn't really manage to squeeze in several of the most distinctive parts of either original line, and (c) ends up rhyming ‘me’ with itself which is clearly cheating.

After some thought I decided to head in a different direction completely, so my revised attempt at a second line is:

“Twit.”
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[personal profile] cebSun 2018-01-21 22:31
That there’s some corner of a foreign field where I'm asleep

(OK, doesn't *quite* rhyme)
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[personal profile] drswirlySun 2018-01-21 22:38
If I should die before I wake, think only this of me:
As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
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[personal profile] jackSun 2018-01-21 22:40
It doesn't really make sense, but:

If I should die before I wake, think only this of me:
You shit, Death, stop fucking porlocking me!
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[personal profile] bugshawSun 2018-01-21 22:52
Let's find embalming fluid that is safely gluten free.
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[personal profile] vyvyanxSun 2018-01-21 22:55
I am not there; one short sleep past, we wake eternally.
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[personal profile] pseudomonasSun 2018-01-21 23:08
"I warned that bloody Annie that I'd lay me doon and dee"
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[personal profile] cjwatsonWed 2018-01-24 12:58
Abandon hope all ye who enter this forbidden tree.
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[personal profile] ptc24Wed 2018-01-24 16:45
I wanted to try to mash up the lyrics of Enter Sandman and Disposable Heroes, but couldn't find a good rhyme for "me". I mean, there's "Victim of what said should be" but even if I try for four lines I can't quite get it to work.
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