When I clean my teeth, it's generally one end or other of the day, so I have a high tendency to be half asleep. Sometimes, this causes me to put rather too much toothpaste on the brush. The result of this is that I get through the brushing and rinsing fine, but then my tongue suddenly notices that things are rather mintier than I'd bargained for.

When this happens, my instinctive response is to try to get as much fresh air around my tongue as I can, which involves simultaneously sticking my tongue out as far as it will go and opening my mouth very wide. This looks very silly in the mirror, not surprisingly, but it seems to help me cool off faster; and the appearance has always vaguely reminded me of something.

Today I realised: it reminds me of a gargoyle. My eyes narrow in an evil-looking way in the process of pulling the face, simply because there isn't room for wide open eyes and a wide open mouth in the same face at the same time. You could probably sculpt the face of Simon-having-used-too-much-toothpaste and put it on the wall of a castle, and it wouldn't look too out of place. The Mint Gargoyle.