Thought for the day

[simont]

When people change things in their lives – jobs, houses, marital status, whatever – it is often customary to send cards saying things like ‘congratulations’ or ‘good luck in your new job’.

It randomly occurred to me this afternoon that nobody ever sends cards like this when things are staying the same. How about sending a ‘good luck staying in your current job’ card to an employee of a company whose stocks have just plummeted? Or ‘congratulations on staying in your current job’ a month or two later, after the mass redundancies have finished? ‘Good luck in your old home’ if it's slowly falling apart or local property prices are falling? ‘Well done for still having all your limbs intact’, sent at irregular intervals to someone who does particularly extreme sports? Lack of change is sometimes just as much of a risk or an achievement as change, and can perfectly well merit celebration.

I suppose you could see birthday cards as congratulating the recipient on still being alive, and wedding anniversary cards likewise on still being married; but I think those lack ambition. There must be a fortune to be made in non-event greetings cards if you're willing to push the cynicism just a bit further :-)

Comments

[xaosenkosmos.livejournal.com]

There's the potential for a whole line of e-cards here. We should put together a business proposal and see if the bubble is really back or not =)

[feanelwa.livejournal.com]

I think that's because people don't really mean "good luck in your new house", they mean "Ooh, you have a new house, I'd like to come and see it when you've unpacked because I am curious, and if you were to ask for some help decorating I might say yes".

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

Or even "congratulations on keeping a job and relationship you enjoy at the same level; there's nothing you can improve" :)

I guess, it's that it's awkward to do something without an excuse. And harder to remember, too :) That is, if there's no defined time to do so, it seems a bit pushy to send a message. Though a casual mention in a longer conversation or missive would work.

For "good luck with your house", I guess it's that people don't send so many cards, so a dodgy is house is overshadowed by someone else's new house. Or that it's too awkward to send a maybe card: saying "sorry, we're thinking of you" works, as does "Yay!" or "good luck about something specific", but "Remember, what you do is likely to delimb you" is awkwarder.

[hairyears.livejournal.com]

Somehow, I really do feel a need to send that special someone a card:

CONGRATULATIONS ON NOT DROPPING DEAD

[rmc28]

One of the reasons I still like to remember other people's birthdays (and my own) is precisely that which you say - a day to say "Hurrah! You're here and you're not dead yet!" Ditto anniversaries.

[hilarita.livejournal.com]

As for anniversaries, there is a point where the market stops. They don't make cards for 70th wedding anniversaries. They assume that you're dead by then.

[jalbobble.livejournal.com]

Hmm, well the obvious response is that people want others to not think that they're near failing (staying in old job, old house falling apart etc.) but don't mind if it's a hard or failure-provoking thing that they have made the decision to do.
Birthday cards etc. are not saying 'yay! you're not dead!' but more 'we are aware that you have reached some sort of a milestone and are thinking of you'.
There are several flaws in the argument, but that's just the weirdness of human nature (like why a person prefers that everyone pretended they didn't see them fall over, rather than going over to help them).

[christhomas123.livejournal.com]

Don't you think sending a card "Well done for not dropping dead yet" is tempting fate just a little?! ;o)

[teleute.livejournal.com]

There must be a fortune to be made in non-event greetings cards if you're willing to push the cynicism just a bit further

It was effectivly this attitude that meant Adrian and I didn't do anything to celebrate dating for one month, despite the fact that all my friends at the time were doing so. His responce when I suggested it was an aghast "you didn't expect us to make it this far?" which was an aspect I'd never particularly considered - that celebrating events is actually fairly cynical ;-)

[ex-lark-asc.livejournal.com]

I suspect this doesn't happen for the same reason you'd come round specifically to punch me if I sent you a card congratulating you on still being single...

[vorno.livejournal.com]

I guess it's just that 'right writes white'.