Space Corps directive #475011

[simont]

Occasionally I feel just a little like Rimmer at work. This morning I sent an email response to a bug report from the support department, saying something along the lines of

Can you explain a little more about why you expect this to work? The C99 standard clearly states (section 7.19.7.3 clause 4) that…

and somewhere in the back of my head, Kryten is responding ‘Section 7.19.7.3 clause 4? No member of the support department shall raise a defect report while wearing a ginger toupée?’

Comments

[philipstorry.livejournal.com]

And sub-clause 1: 'Unless it's the Christmas party and at least 9 units of alcohol have been consumed.'

Of course, as with all good rulesets, that actually conflicts with another rule. Section 2.23.5.1 Clause 1: 'The bug trackers and source version control servers must be turned off during office parties, especially office parties that involve alcohol.'

[simont]

:-)

It's been suggested a number of times (mostly in jest) that computers should contain breathalyser devices and have certain pieces of functionality be conditional on a clean report from them. The "send" button in MUAs is the most common suggestion. But you may have a point there, that the "commit" command in version control software would be another good candidate...

[philipstorry.livejournal.com]

I'm imagining a world in which such a breathalyser device is standard on all PCs...

I suspect the software for that would be much like the various Net Nanny programs. That is, never have so many teenage minds been so applied to such a sustained attack... ;-)

I give it hours after each release before someone finds a bug or a way past it.

And I think I'm being generous... ;-)

Even worse, the breathalysers might might interfere with the Ballmer Peak: http://xkcd.com/323/

Unless you use them to enforce it by locking the machines... Hmmm.

I may have to suggest this to my boss! ;-)

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

Or commit to trunk. You don't want to commit anything that's going to make a difference, but you do want to track the changes (just in case they're useful), so you could safely commit to the "pissed" branch, and the next day merge into trunk or abandon it as you like.

[pne.livejournal.com]

It's been suggested a number of times (mostly in jest) that computers should contain breathalyser devices and have certain pieces of functionality be conditional on a clean report from them. The "send" button in MUAs is the most common suggestion.

Google Mail has a plugin for something similar - between certain hours (where you're, apparently, only wake if you've been partying), you have to solve an equation or something before it'll let you send your message.

[hatam-soferet.livejournal.com]

...cackles...